-Mmm. Mmm. Great turkey leg. [ Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance”
playing on car radio ] -♪ Da da doo-doo-mmm,
just dance ♪ -It’s Britney, bitch. -How’s my favorite branch doing? Alright. -Fact — I am older, I am wiser.
Do not mess with me. -[ Hawking ]
-Stop it! No! Come on! Michael! -Open your mouth!
-No, Michael! -That’s so cool
how you have my name. I am downloading some N3P music.
-That’s not it. -This is so great, huh? -It looks like we’re
gonna be here for awhile, so why don’t you make a little
plate of hummus for everyone? Little triangles of pita
toasted on both side, fanned so you can
easily grab them. -I know —
-And napkins — fanned. -I like to bring in some of
my Kevin’s Famous Chili. [ Applause ]
-Thank you. It’s a straight jacket!
[ Clattering ] -It’s gonna take a long time… …and then it’s perfect. -If I don’t have some cake soon,
I might die. -Why don’t you
just have an apple? -Why don’t you
mind your business? [ Whistle blows ]
-Next stop, Cu…camonga.
-[ Giggles ] -You want how many spiral pads?
-Um…well, 50. I over order because — -Confidence —
it’s the food of the wise man but the liquor of the fool. -Hmm. I’m looking forward to getting
to know you better, Vikram. -So, hey, I wanna set you up
with my daughter. -Oh, I’m engaged to Pam. -I thought you were gay. -Then why would you want to
set me up with your daughter? -I don’t know. -[ Indistinct ] -Everybody stay calm.
Everybody stay calm. -What’s the procedure?
-Stay [bleep] calm! Time to carbo load. -Thank you all for coming.
-I would like to toast — -I would also like to toast.
-I also would like to toast. -I’d like to make a toast…
to the troops. -Everyone here
who’s bowled a 280, please raise your hand. -Wow.
-No way. A 280? -Man, I would love
to burn your candles. -You burn it, you buy it. -Oh, good. I’ll be
your first customer! -You’re hardly my first. -That’s what she said! -Amen.
Just keep the ribs coming. [ Chuckles ] -Put it in your mouth
and just eat it. -God, I hate it.
-I don’t care whether you hate it.
You said you’d do it. [ Sniffs ]
This is a white. -Whoo!
-Whoa. Whoa, whoa. -I’m full. -We have sweet glazed,
cinnamon sugar, chocolate, white chocolate, fudge, M&M’s, caramel dip, mint chip, chocolate chip,
marshmallows, nuts, toffee nuts, coconut, peanut butter drizzle, Oreo,
sprinkles, cotton candy bits,
and powdered sugar. -Is there any way that you could
do all — all of them? -The works. You got it.
-Uhn-uhn. No one has seconds
until everyone’s had some. -You’re doing great, Michael.
Look at you go. -She probably won’t be up
for a few hours. -[ Grunts ]
[ Thud ] -Next stop, pies.
Next stop, pies. -Next stop, pies.