My elementary school was
having a big costume contest. But they should’ve called it
what it really was: “A Return of the Jedi contest.” All the kids were going as either
a Luke, Leia, Vader, Boba Fett or C3PO. Well, I was going to beat them all. Because come Halloween,
as I announced to my friends, there was going to be
a 7-foot Wookiee coming to town. My friend Scott said, “Oh, yeah?
How are you going to do that? None of the Halloween stores
sell Chewbacca costumes.” I said, “Hey, kid.
Never tell me the odds.” The truth was
I knew something my friend didn’t. My mom was a creative genius
and could create any costume from scratch. What I’d envisioned was a life-like Chewbacca
with a suit of brown hair and stilts underneath
to get me up to 7-feet. But also have all the accoutrement,
like the chest belt and the crossbow. Basically I’d be channeling
Peter Mayhew circa 1983. The whole school would be blown away. When I came home and announced
the idea to my mom she said, “OK, but you know
it’s three days before Halloween. And I’m also finishing your sisters’ costumes
and I have to work.” Oh, yeah. My three sisters. And my mom’s job. But my mom was ready to help
wherever she could. We started at the Halloween store just to see
if they had anything to get us started. Within 5 minutes we found
an officially licensed Lucasfilm Chewbacca mask with the hair and the teeth. The lady at the store said,
“Sorry, we don’t have a full Chewbacca suit.” I said, “No problem.” And turned
to my mom for the detailed plan. She said, “let’s go carpet shopping. We’ll find you a nice brown shag carpet
that I’ll sew into a suit.” I didn’t know what a shag carpet was, but she explained it had long threads
that looked like hair. It made sense. We spent all Sunday
looking for a brown shag carpet. We went from store to store.
We found white, we found black, but no brown. With time running out we had to go
with the only option: A regular short length rug. No shag. But always the optimist my mom assured me
that I was going to look great. The big day arrived: Halloween. The school blacktop looked
like a scene out of Tatooine. You got your Lukes, Hans, Landos,
Jabba the Hutt, even a Bib Fortuna. Although that was my science teacher
and he wasn’t in costume. Then, slowly, heads started to turn. Yeah, yeah. I wasn’t seven feet.
That’s for sure. To give you an idea of what I looked like
imagine cutting up a tan rug, rolling up the pieces into arms,
legs and a torso, and sewing them all together with twine. Also, imagine the same kid
forgot to tell his mom that Chewbacca needed
furry hands and furry feet. So, the legendary Wookiee had little Caucasian hands
and white Reeboks. When a teacher finally asked
who I was supposed to be, I didn’t have the heart to say Chewbacca. So I just said,
“I’m a tan and brown monster.” It was no fault of my mom, of course.
She did everything she could in three days. I guess we all have our famous
or infamous costumes from our childhood. What was yours?
Tell me in the comments. I read them all. In fact, your comments on my last video
were hilarious, so thanks for that. Nutrients! I took the topic to Google image search and when you look up the word “masculine”,
this is what comes up in the first page. This guy modeling camouflage thongs. You can watch that one
by clicking there or in the link below. Don’t miss a video of mine. Subscribe on YouTube
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